Trust-Full Relationships

There is one thing that is common to every individual, relationship, team, family, organization, nation, economy and civilization throughout the world — one thing which, if removed, will destroy the most powerful government, the most successful business, the most thriving economy, the most influential leadership, the greatest friendship, the strongest character, the deepest love.  On the other hand, if developed and leveraged, that one thing has the potential to create unparalleled success and prosperity in every dimension of life.  That one thing is trust.

The Speed of Trust by Stephen M.R. Covey

What is Trust?

Trust is the critical element of a relationship.  As Stephen M. R. Covey puts it… Lack of trust destroys; Presence of trust creates.  My favorite definition of Trust is ‘firm reliance’.  As leaders we must ask ourselves:

  • How would I describe the bond between the people I work with and myself?  Is it Full of Trust?  

  • When I work with others – do we seem to give each other the benefit of the doubt – or is there constant doubt and questioning.  

  • Would people say you are credible or question the accuracy of your statements?  Do others know we mean what we say, or do others always check for a hidden agenda?  

  • When we hit a roadblock in a project, does the team seamlessly adjust to overcome, or does the roadblock stop the team in its track – needing crystal clarity to proceed.   

At work, we want relationships where we can firmly rely on each other, so that even when the inevitable problems and issues arise, we can continue to adapt and move forward.

If only Trust were simple in terms of what creates it and what breaks it down.  Trust is multifaceted and there are many reasons that trust is built and many reasons why trust breaks down.

When I think of my relationships, I find the following 6 facets helpful in understanding where trust is strong and where trust needs to be built.  Notice that there are two sides to each of these facets. As a Leader you might ask, “Do we believe each other to be...”  

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The 6 Facets of Trust

Sincere – we both mean what we say; There are no hidden agendas between us

Competent – we have the skills & motivation to do what we commit to

Reliable – our past experience of each other indicates we have done what we said we would do

Credible – we substantiate our statements; being clear what is fact, perception and supposition

Empathy – we care about each other; trying to deeply understand the other’s point of view and situation

Integrity – we walk our talk; what we say and what we do are one

Leader Know How Practice: Apply it to you Own Leadership

  1. Think of a person you do not trust at work.  Using the 6 facets above, assess where your relationship is not trust-full.

  2. What are you doing differently (or extra) to make up for the lack of trust?

  3. What might you do to rebuild trust in that area?